I was talking with my son last night and told him about the start of this blog. I took him to the link from Amber and asked him if he would be willing to listen to the part of the voices. He agreed as he wanted to see if what he experiences is like others. We didn't get far into when he said to turn it off. I have to admit, I was worried about it bothering him and perhaps being too much. I wanted to know if it was what he goes through.
As we talked, I learned more about what it's like for him. The voices were like what he hears. What an eye opener that was. The only difference was he wasn't able to hear what they were actually saying, it was muffled, which is a blessing.
Despite the fact that he is on medication that is working wonders finally--it's taken years to find the right "cocktail" (that's how it's described for the mixture), that he needed to get him on track--he still on occasion hears the voices again. They aren't as bad as they had been, but when he experiences this, it wears him out and the next day he has a real hard time staying awake, feels drained, and has a hard time focusing and functioning.
For those of us that don't experience this type of thing can be thankful that we don't have to live like this. It's very real. They aren't making this stuff up. It's a real life experience that they live with on a daily basis.
I have had people tell me that it's all made up, they make themselves think these things, that they use it as an excuse to get out of having to work and live the easy life, what they need is a swift kick in the pants to get off their lazy butts. It burns me to hear these things, as they have no clue. They only hurt those suffering from the diseases more by talking like this way.
I can tell you that it drives Jay nuts. He wants to live a normal life. He wants to be able to hold down a job, but his phsychosis creates a fear of people for him. He is improving bit by bit, but can not handle being around a crowd of people. On occasion he is able to cope, but far and few between times. He wants to work like everyone else. He hates getting assistance, as he feels he doesn't deserve it. He's struggling and trying hard to get somewhere in life.
This is a true and real delima that schizophrenics deal with. They can be really hard on themselves thinking "they" should be able to control it. Often times they will go off their medications thinking they don't need it anymore, or they should be able to make it go away on their own. Not the case. We as parents living with him can testify to the fact that by going off the medications only makes things worse. I'll do another post on what happens when doing so.
I just ask that society starts to open their eyes to mental illness. Realize the delimas they go through. Realize that it's very real. Realize that it is hard on the individuals to go through life feeling like failures, feeling worthless, feeling like a burden. I'm just thankful we were able to get ourselves to get information concerning what was happening with him. To realize that it is a disease that occurs in the brain ceptors that we can not control.
We must stop throwing stones at these people, as we only make matters worse for them. We cause them to withdraw into themselves even more. If we want them to become beneficial members of society, then we need to except them for who they are and work with them. Pushing them away isn't the answer. So please, I beg you as a parent of someone who watches what happens to a loving person keep tucked away because of the stigma society places on those with mental illnesses, stop the stigma, be kind, and accept them with open arms. They need us!
Please go to the link I have posted on the prior message. When you go to the site with the pictures with audio, click on the second link, it explains a few things and then plays the voices that they hear. You will be shocked. It's not an easy thing to listen to. Thank You.
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