Well, I love how some parents just don't seem to care or get it or maybe they have a mental illness themselves. I had to take C's dad to talk to R's teacher. Turned out that his meeting was with the school psychologist. This was a blessing. R's report was great. However, P learned that C was not diagnosed with Aspergers! Grrrr. He has an auditory problem for sure. He has some symptoms of Aspergers, but it is not that. He has some symptoms of Autism, but it is not that. So we are back to square one with him.
I'm asking for prayer for C as he really needs a lot of help. His condition, what ever it is has been getting steadily worse. He's almost to the point of being uncontrollable. I have a hard time being with him and I love kids! He has a smart mouth, is argumentive, talks back, does things constantly he knows he shouldn't do, but when you get after him, it's as though he can not comprehend what you are saying.
Last week I had to drive him home with wet pants. He had been getting into constant trouble and then got angry and wet himself. Beleive me, that was not a joyful ride home. I think my husband is onto something. When mom was pregnant with him, she took all kinds of pills to try to abort him. Hmmm, sounds like this is what caused so many problems for the little man. My heart bleeds for him. I pray that somehow, someway, he can over come most or all of this. I worry about what he will be like as he grows older, as he is strong and loves to hurt others, or gets way to rough at times. You can try to get him to stop, but it takes a lot and his little sister is not that strong. Not to mention the baby.
For now C loves his baby brother, but what happens if jealousy sets in. See where I'm going with this. Fits thrown and pain inflicted on others now. Jealousy, yeah, that scares me. There have been times when he's hugged me and squeezed harder and harder when I told him to let go because my back was in bad shape. I would literally have to pry him off then he would sit there and laugh.
Anyway, I did not intend for this piece to end up like this. I'm not putting anyone down. I'm not trying to be discouraging, what I am doing is praying someone out there may have some insight. Has anyone else dealt with this type of behavior? If so, please share. If you would rather not comment on here then go ahead and e-mail me. Prayers are very welcome. He's only 7 and already in so disoriented. Thank you and God Bless!
Friday, April 24, 2009
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Hell to all! It's been far too long since my last post here. That's simply because I had started my own blog for a bit, but that didn't last all that long. The blog was called My Life As A Schizophrenic. Which so happens to still be linked to from here, but no longer exists. So, I will have my mother remove that link here soon. There's nothing I hate more, than a dead link. I would remove it, but I can only post to this blog. No admin rights for me!
I now plan to contribute more here, now that I am no longer blogging on my own. I don't know if I will be able to offer much, but I will try my best. I am operating on less than two hours of sleep in the past two days. So, if this post gets weird or goofy at any point, that would be why.
As my mother has pointed out previously, my original Dx was Bi-polar Mood Disorder. Later down the road, my Dx was elevated to Schizophrenia. Some people would say that they suffer from the disease, but I say that I am living with the disease. Sometimes it controls me. Yet, for the most part, I control it. With medication to take the edge off and my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ taking care of the rest, I am generally a pretty balanced person.
That being said, I do have down days. Those days are absolute torture. I become withdrawn, paranoia sets in. Then come the delusions and hallucinations. Don't take this the wrong way though. I deal with these symptoms everyday, but my down days are a lot more severe. I never leave the house unless absolutely necessary.
I am going to talk about my medication quick then end this post. Currently I am taking: Lithium, Abilify, Zoloft, Welbutrin and Loxapine. My doc is going to take me off the Loxapine next month. One less pill to worry about. So far though, this is the best combination that I have been on thus far.
If you have any questions for me, please leave a comment and I will reply quickly. I may even give out my email address if you would like to talk more in depth.
Thank for reading and God bless
Jay
I now plan to contribute more here, now that I am no longer blogging on my own. I don't know if I will be able to offer much, but I will try my best. I am operating on less than two hours of sleep in the past two days. So, if this post gets weird or goofy at any point, that would be why.
As my mother has pointed out previously, my original Dx was Bi-polar Mood Disorder. Later down the road, my Dx was elevated to Schizophrenia. Some people would say that they suffer from the disease, but I say that I am living with the disease. Sometimes it controls me. Yet, for the most part, I control it. With medication to take the edge off and my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ taking care of the rest, I am generally a pretty balanced person.
That being said, I do have down days. Those days are absolute torture. I become withdrawn, paranoia sets in. Then come the delusions and hallucinations. Don't take this the wrong way though. I deal with these symptoms everyday, but my down days are a lot more severe. I never leave the house unless absolutely necessary.
I am going to talk about my medication quick then end this post. Currently I am taking: Lithium, Abilify, Zoloft, Welbutrin and Loxapine. My doc is going to take me off the Loxapine next month. One less pill to worry about. So far though, this is the best combination that I have been on thus far.
If you have any questions for me, please leave a comment and I will reply quickly. I may even give out my email address if you would like to talk more in depth.
Thank for reading and God bless
Jay
Friday, April 3, 2009
Update
I apologize for not having written anything in here for so long. Much has happened since the last time I posted. I need to go back through and refresh my memory of past posts, but will write what is on my mind at the moment.
I’ve learned a bit about dealing with a child with Aspergers. For one, the worst thing a person can do is tell them they have it and then baby them. Yes, they need extra attention/affection, but there is a degree to it as well. My grandsom’s mother tells him he has it and tells his brother to go easy on him as he has the disease, which is basically telling the child that he can do as he pleases, “he has an excuse.” Now this is second hand information, so I’m praying this is not the case, but does explain his recent behavior and his brothers temperment towards him.
Since finding out about the disease, when his dad and my daughter do have him and I take care of him, it is very trying. He continually tells me, “Omah, I can’t help it, I have Aspergers.” I tell him that it doesn’t mean that he can do as he pleases and he argues with me saying, “Yes it does.” If I don’t give into him, he starts whining or crying. It’s become very frustrating, as there are times when I’m forever having to get after him, and/or correct him. There have been times he starts actually crying and asks me why I’m so mean, and what kind of a grandmother am I. It breaks my heart, as I know he’s frustrated as well.
But what do you do? When he’s getting it from one parent that he can as he pleases and doesn’t get reprimanded for it, then comes to us and does get reprimanded, he becomes a basket case, and who wouldn’t for that matter.
So there are basically two messages here. One has to do with divorce and children, which I’ll save for my other blog, but the other has to do with the disorder. When you find your child has a disorder, please, please, please, seek help for him/her. When you refuse to get the necessary counseling/help for a child, you are only hurting them more. Further more, when you baby them and protect them, you are hurting them more. Not to mention their siblings. It affects the whole household. You are doing no one any favors by ignoring the problem and/or pascifying the person.
I guess being a parent of a schizophrenic makes it easier to see that by not getting help, it worsens the problem. But, it also seems so blatent obvious that the child needs help. Also, I have a nephew that obviously had a mental disorder but my sister refused to accept it and claimed he was just socially slow. Now it’s been hard on both of them since he became an adult. I hate seeing her beat herself up for not accpeting the problem and trying to protect him all those years.
As you can see, the affects involve everyone. Not just the person with the disorder, but everyone involved with the child. The teachers have to deal with this as well. It’s not an easy task for them. Hopefully each child with a disability will have a teacher that is aware of what a child goes through and is compassionate enough to work with the kids, help them, and not just push them through the system. This happened with my nephew. Thankfully so far my grandson is in a good school and they are working with him. There was one teacher that was not doing as she should and was causing problems, but that was caught and dealt with quickly through an outstanding, caring program here that was started by a man who has a child with Aspergers.
I wish you the best with your child/person you care for with the disorder, or any mental disorder for that matter. It’s not an easy task. It takes a lot of patience, love, and a compassionate heart. If you don’t have what it takes to work with your child/family member, then please, find someone who can. They deserve a fighting chance in life. They are human, no different from us. We all have our flaws. Not one of us is perfect. It’s just easier to see the flaws in some than in others. Above all, get the person help. Get the person into counseling programs that work. Do your background checks and make sure it is a legite company first. Putting them in an organization that doesn’t really care nor have the proper knowledge only makes the problems worse as well.
I’ve learned a bit about dealing with a child with Aspergers. For one, the worst thing a person can do is tell them they have it and then baby them. Yes, they need extra attention/affection, but there is a degree to it as well. My grandsom’s mother tells him he has it and tells his brother to go easy on him as he has the disease, which is basically telling the child that he can do as he pleases, “he has an excuse.” Now this is second hand information, so I’m praying this is not the case, but does explain his recent behavior and his brothers temperment towards him.
Since finding out about the disease, when his dad and my daughter do have him and I take care of him, it is very trying. He continually tells me, “Omah, I can’t help it, I have Aspergers.” I tell him that it doesn’t mean that he can do as he pleases and he argues with me saying, “Yes it does.” If I don’t give into him, he starts whining or crying. It’s become very frustrating, as there are times when I’m forever having to get after him, and/or correct him. There have been times he starts actually crying and asks me why I’m so mean, and what kind of a grandmother am I. It breaks my heart, as I know he’s frustrated as well.
But what do you do? When he’s getting it from one parent that he can as he pleases and doesn’t get reprimanded for it, then comes to us and does get reprimanded, he becomes a basket case, and who wouldn’t for that matter.
So there are basically two messages here. One has to do with divorce and children, which I’ll save for my other blog, but the other has to do with the disorder. When you find your child has a disorder, please, please, please, seek help for him/her. When you refuse to get the necessary counseling/help for a child, you are only hurting them more. Further more, when you baby them and protect them, you are hurting them more. Not to mention their siblings. It affects the whole household. You are doing no one any favors by ignoring the problem and/or pascifying the person.
I guess being a parent of a schizophrenic makes it easier to see that by not getting help, it worsens the problem. But, it also seems so blatent obvious that the child needs help. Also, I have a nephew that obviously had a mental disorder but my sister refused to accept it and claimed he was just socially slow. Now it’s been hard on both of them since he became an adult. I hate seeing her beat herself up for not accpeting the problem and trying to protect him all those years.
As you can see, the affects involve everyone. Not just the person with the disorder, but everyone involved with the child. The teachers have to deal with this as well. It’s not an easy task for them. Hopefully each child with a disability will have a teacher that is aware of what a child goes through and is compassionate enough to work with the kids, help them, and not just push them through the system. This happened with my nephew. Thankfully so far my grandson is in a good school and they are working with him. There was one teacher that was not doing as she should and was causing problems, but that was caught and dealt with quickly through an outstanding, caring program here that was started by a man who has a child with Aspergers.
I wish you the best with your child/person you care for with the disorder, or any mental disorder for that matter. It’s not an easy task. It takes a lot of patience, love, and a compassionate heart. If you don’t have what it takes to work with your child/family member, then please, find someone who can. They deserve a fighting chance in life. They are human, no different from us. We all have our flaws. Not one of us is perfect. It’s just easier to see the flaws in some than in others. Above all, get the person help. Get the person into counseling programs that work. Do your background checks and make sure it is a legite company first. Putting them in an organization that doesn’t really care nor have the proper knowledge only makes the problems worse as well.
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